Forever..Always..

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“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and
that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate
is a mirror, the person who shows you
everything that is holding you back, the person
who brings you to your own attention so you can
change your life.
A true soul mate is probably the most important
person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down
your walls and smack you awake. But to live with
a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul
mates, they come into your life just to reveal
another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.
A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear
apart your ego a little bit, show you your
obstacles and addictions, break your heart open
so new light can get in, make you so desperate
and out of control that you have to transform
your life, then introduce you to your spiritual
master…”

We started talking to each other in 2005. Previously, we’d only just say ‘hi’ to each other. This time, it was a long-ish conversation and even though it involved exchanging movie dvds..I will forever remember it because thats what broke all the previous awkwardness.

He came into my life a time when I was struggling with family issues. I was soon to learn that I was not alone. He too was going through a hard time and at some point his sister, mother and him even moved out of their house and rented an apartment not so far away. This was the first thing that made us bond for the first time. We connected in a way that I had never connected with anyone before. We opened up to each other, showing our trust for each other and we conforted each other..we were each other’s shoulder to lean on.

M and I were slowly falling in love with each other. He made me smile when times were hard and made everything seem okay when it was not. Laughter became a part of my life in a very strong way. I remember my mother telling my sister to try and cheer up and start learning to smile through it all..like I was doing. Thats the day I realized I had trully changed..for the better. Almost overnight too..I had gone from sulky-in-photos too Super-Photogenic!! 😀 Haha. Am serious! You should see my photos from way back when.. I looked like I had been scolded then forced to take a photo, as more punishment. Hahahaa.

He is very easygoing without being blase and am the total opposite. I was usually the quietest person in any group of people..especially a new group of people. That soon changed. Even though am not the loudest, I am now out of the backstage. He taught me how to take life easy and quit being so uptight about everything.

I always say this to him and I always thank God for this; he is the kindest heart I know and even think I’ll ever know. For him, happiness comes naturally, I think. Haha. While some of us are struggling with a daily reminder to be happy always, he seems to just take it in stride. I want to be like him. I admire him. Definitely want to spend the rest of my life learning the secrets of his happy heart. Deep down I know the secret is God.

However, I dont know about that part where soulmates have to leave. God knows I want him in my life forever. 8 years of friendship I believe would only be fair if pushed to a lifetime.

M is my soulmate, my best friend, my lover, my partner, my companion.
Forever..Always..

Till forever dies,
Love.

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We All Belong

As I walked to church this past Sunday I was amazed at how strong and loud the worship team leader’s voice sounded even from outside. And even as I walked in, the singing was so lively and I thought to myself, “Wow! This lady sure leads passionately..” By the time she was back at the platform with her team, to make a presentation it was quite clear that her voice was already hoarse from all the singing.

The speaker that Sunday was a certain young lady and after praying so she can begin her preaching for the day..she did the most unusual thing, well, atleast to me. She turned to where the worship team was seated and put the worship leader in the limelight. At the top of her voice, she spoke blessings into her life for what lasted like 5 minutes and at that moment it was so quiet. She noticed this and reassured the congregation. Told us not to worry because she moves by the spirit.

As she spoke these beautiful things into her life, culminating it with a resounding Amen, I couldnt help but think…What of the other members of the worship team, dint they deserve blessings too..? Why did she focus on that one lady alone? But like she said, she moves by the Spirit.

..all that just got me thinkin..

Is it right the way we elevate others spiritually just because they seem to move masses..in the things they do..things that awe us..?

How about the people that are in the background..kind of like the background singers.. We know the song wouldnt be as harmonious without them there, adding all those special tones and pitches…

Could it be that all we care about is that one person that is able to stand out perhaps due to their special skills and abilities…?

I like to think everyone deserves a chance to be shown that their special even though their input is perhaps not to the same exact measure as that of the ‘lead’ person.

Does it make me holier or more special that I cry when I lead people in song and move people to cry as well and it turns into an overwhelming trance of an emotional moment for the people?? No. We are all equal before His eyes. We all belong to Him.

Jus wondering,
Love.

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